by Bruce Middleton, June 26, 2007

Fishing is great exercise and a way to drop unwanted pounds…


Are you feeling fat, out of shape and low on energy? Then you need Doctor’s Bruce’s new miracle cure to help you lose those unwanted pounds and give you back that youthful vitality you once had. Just one dose 2 to 3 times a week and you too can be a lean mean fighting machine. Just listen to what Larry of Pudunk Illinois has to say about this amazing new program to loose weight.

“I were a big ol’ guy who sat about the house and howlered at the little women for more beer all the time, but now I kin actually get up and get my own. It’s amazin’.”

These and thousand like him have discovered Doctors Bruce’s new miracle cure and it has improved their quality of life. You can actually get up and turn the television channel instead of watching what’s on that same old station. It will open up a whole new world of discovery for you. Just listen to what Jed from Fishington Oregon has to say.

“Why if’n it twer’nt fer doctor Bruce’s miracle cure I’d be forever stuck in this here chair watch’n channel 12 cause I didn’t have the getty-up to get up and find the remote.

You to can join the thousands of satisfied customers how have followed Doctor Bruce’s miracle cure to a richer and fuller life style. You will be able to enjoy more of life and have less aches and pains as a result. And it’s so easy. Anyone can do it. Just listen to what Doug has to say from Remote South Carolina.

“I have a fuller life style thanks to Doctor Bruce’s new Miracle Cure. And I don’t
hurt as much as I used ta.”

Truer words have never been spoken. Doctor Bruce’s new miracle cure can be had for today not for $100, NOT FOR $75 but for the unbelievable price of just $49.95. But because we want everyone to have a chance to change their life style to a new and better way we are now offering this exclusive cure for just three easy payments of $19.95 each. Phone in now and start your way to a new and better you.

________________________________________________________________________


(YOU FALL FOR IT, PAY $60 INSTEAD OF $50 AND THIS IS WHAT YOU GET.)

DOCTOR BRUCE’S MIRACLE CURE

Step 1- go bass fishing following these steps. First load the boat onto the trailer. If you have a small boat this will force you to lift the boat up unto the ball of the trailer hitch. This is power lifting and burns off 3800 calories and hour. If you have a bass boat, you have a crank handle to raise and lower the tongue of the trailer. Turn the handle until the boat is down on the ball of the trailer hitch and well off the ground. This is an upper bodywork out and burns 3750 calories and hour.

Step 2- make eleven trips to the house, garage and the boat to load all the fishing equipment you need to go bass fishing. Don’t forget the net and remember to bring along a life vest for safety. This is an aerobic work out and burns 2250 calories per hour.

Step 3- drive to your favorite lake. This is a necessary rest period used by your muscles to recover from the sudden strain and shock of over use. Oh, and by the way, just breathing burns 50 calories and hour.

Step 4 unload the boat. This requires you to make several trips around the boat disconnecting straps, untying ropes and removing the winch cable, driving the boat back into the water and then beaching the boat while you park the truck. You then have to force march back to the boat before you can launch it. This is full cardiac work out with aerobics thrown in for extra measure with heavy lifting. This activity burns 4300 calories and hour.

Step 5 launching the boat. Push the boat away from shore and walk to the back of the boat and start the engine. This exercise requires heavy lifting at 3800 calories an hour. A balance exercise combined with a cardiac work out at 4300 calories an hour and starting the engine is classified as heavy lifting especially if the motor hasn’t had the pull rope moved in a couple of years. All together this exercise burns an amazing 6000 calories an hour. No they aren’t additive.

Step 6- start fishing. This is an upper body work out that burns approximately 9 calories a year. But combined with breathing adds up to 50.90000002 calories a hour.

Step 7- catching a bass. Catching a bass involves bending and stretching much like yoga and burns and incredible 59 calories a hour but the side benefit of rejuvenating your adrenalin gland burns 50 calories for each bass caught. A real bonus there folks.

Steps 8 through 10 reverse the loading process and call it the load the boat and go home exercise. This burns the same number of calories as you did while loading the boat to go fishing.

And there you go folks, Doctor Bruce’s miracle cure. Why the average person can easily burn off a total of 250 to 450 calories a day just by going fish for bass. Isn’t that incredible. 250 to 450 calories a day. Why you will be slim and trim in no time at all. And it only cost you three easy payments of $19.95. Now that is money well spent.


The truth is the average person must burn off over 2000 a day just to burn up what he or she ate that day and 2000 calories is what most people take in on a diet. A cheeseburger with bacon, large fries and a coke has over 3000 calories in it and you haven’t counted breakfast, dinner or snacks.

But it was fun writing this piece and that what it was all about anyway. I love poking fun at those info-mersals that promise the world but never quite seem to deliver. Bass fishing is a fun sport and if you do burn a few more calories than normal well so much the better and if it just gets you out of the house for a while that is good too. I hope you enjoyed the, hopefully funny story, Bruce

bpmiddleton@peoplepc.com